Mindscanner #54
IT'S GREAT TO BE A KLINGON
by Kijo of the Cha'ouw (Charles Smith)
[email protected]

Greetings, fellow Klin Brothers and Sisters, this month finds your fellow Klin bard with lots of great stories. As always, I bring you tales of warriors and the greatness of being a Klingon. Nuff of that, on with the story...

Ok so here I am in St. Louis, MO at a Con - Slanted Fedora "Fab Four Tour" . Jan, 23 1999. It's early, and you boys and girls know that Kijo does NOT like the sun, being a night-time party animal. I get up at 7:30 to get ready. I look out the hotel window and there's a full blown blizzard going on outside. Does that stop a Klingon? Hell NO!

I leave the Terran hotel at 8:30am. I grab my gear, head down into the cold, get into the vehicle, and make my way to Highway 70 and on to the CON... Cars are swerving on the road, but I continue to head in the direction of the con, oooppps there's a car that slides off the road and comes to a stop, no harm done they are just a little shaken. I continue on. By this time I'm past the point of no return. Fortunately the closer I get to the con, the more the snow eases up.

I climb out of the vehicle and make my way into the CON. Ahhh look at all the pretty little feddies... but where are my fellow Klingon Buddies???

"Wackkkkk" on the back comes a pat and a greeting from some fellow Klingons, they are in civies but greet me nevertheless.

Qu'vaq tai Ql'juH, is there! One of the Local Klingons from Home World...

And there's more of our fellow Klin, though not in uniform yet. The word is they will change and be in uniform for Sunday, but today is Saturday and I have much to do and see!!

You can tell the feddies, they look at us and when we walk by they part like the red seas for the "K'Moses". Oh you did know he was a Klingon, right? Who else could part a sea with the swipe of a hand...

well ok but he probably knew a lot of Klingons so there!

On with the tour.. ohhhh loook there's Chase Masterson and she's walking my way... lucky me hmmmmm, she smiles "My what a nice uniform" I of course smile back and admire her tight body-forming uniform. She is the first guest of honor. People are filling into the stadium where she is going to speak.. look you can see the feddies scurrying here and there, trying to get the best angle for a photo op while she's on stage.

I, who have paid more for a con ticket than a Klingon should have to, go looking for my all-too-expensive reserved seating to take my photo.. but look over there.. there's some feddie sitting in MY paid-in-full reserved seating!!!

I have a choice... I can grab the feddie, throttle him, throw him out of the chair, but then who would clean up the mess he leaves behind as he wets himself and the chair.... not I, that's a Gorn's job...

Instead, I decide to walk down the center of the isle. The feddies who are taking pictures see me coming.. the first guy rises up from his position, then moves out of the way, his partner sees him move, looks up, sees me coming and moves out the way.

By this time the photo op feddie-hunting do-gooders look back,

see what the Ka'motion is and decide that they too should move out of the way.. I walk straight up to the front and take my pictures, right in front of Chase. I walk to both sides of the stage and take pictures, even from where the feddies aren't allowed to go... heheheheh. I'm thinking, "It's great to be a Klingon!" <BEG>

The photos, if you want to see more, will be placed on the House K'Irk Website <www.norca.org/Ki'RK> They should be there the week of Feb 1st.

I'm off to another con in 4 hours. hmmm just realized I'm only going to get three hours' sleep, oh well, it's off to see Harry Kim, or was that hairy Kim..?.
 

Qa'Pla! Honor to your Houses.. Glory to the Empire!

Kijo, House Ki'RK